But I'm just typing that so I can read it later. I like reading something I've heard. Who am I talking to? You are a blog. You are not a: person, community, group, sentient being, penguin, cup of tea. It is much easier to say what you are not, than to say what you are. You are: a blog and you are turtles all the way down.
I suppose it's easier to say what something isn't rather than what it is? Does this epiphany make me a scientist!?
My good friend, Dr. Pebblegrasper (head of the prehistoric archaeology department at Sanford U would say, "No, you are not a scientist anymore than Jesus was a Raptor."
Well, maybe I'll be a scientist yet.
I'll not write of the French Student Teacher again. It is too painful to bring up love lost. Too painful to think of what could have been. As Dr. Brown described in the fifth "Back to the Future" movie, if you change one thing in the past, you "could" (scare-quotes mine) change everything in the future.
A more complex idea of this would have, not on future branching off, but thousands upon hundreds of thousands of branches branching off of branches. Try imagining you are an avid gardener with some form of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Your new neighbor is Captain Planet and he just planted an ocean of mammoth Weeping Willow Trees lining every border of your property. In three weeks you drown in your attic, buried under millions of thin, plant Willow-whips. That's a fraction of the outcomes of your life based on choices.
As things look now, my choices will lead me to drowning in tears of lonely sorrow in a lifeless attic of my own.
Do not get so caught up in the choices you make that decide to not make choices. It will destroy you. It's like, trying to convince yourself you are "nothing" or like believing that you can help everyone in the world. You aren't nothing, you can't help everyone. If with every decision that ever presents itself to you, you sit and ponder and wonder and think think think and try to figure out the best course of action which would give you the next best course of action which would in turn give you the next possible course of action, you will bleed out your mind and soul in a cascade of splintering dominoes.
The decisions you make affect every other part of your life. Don't worry about it. You will do nothing and you will go mad.
I took Saathi for a walk tonight. She is a good dog, but a terrible listener. Still, it is amazing what a fifteen minute walk can do. No music, no people, and a dog that at least pretends to listen to you as you rant about things which must be ranted about. Other good listeners include: pillow, steering wheel, toothbrush (can be difficult to communicate) an open field, angry storm clouds, tombstones and pizza boxes.
While probably the worst listeners of all animate and inanimate objects (aside from grandparents who are starting to lose their marbles) cats are excused from criticism on this subject, because they simply don't care about your feelings... at all. Your personal possessions would, if they could.
I'm leaving this country soon. If you are an American I know, tell me if you want a gift. It would be great if you told me exactly what you want. That makes my life easier. If you say, "Oh I don't know bring me back something Australian." I will bring you back the Australian Common Cold, or some dirt. It won't be pretty red/orange dirt, it will be gross brown dirty dirt. Ya know, even if you tell me exactly what you want, I probably won't get it for you anyway, most likely because I don't like you.
If you are Estonian, Russian or Hungarian, I would love to get you and personally give you a gift for your faithful attempts at using my blog as a way to better improve your terrible English skills, but I will never go to Estonia, I will not look for you in Russia, and if I ever make it to Hungary, I feel like it would be similar to passing through a very small town without seeing it.
If you are Canadian, I do not want to buy you a gift.
Cheers,
Melmoth
No comments:
Post a Comment